Don't Force Sharing!

 

Sharing is fantastic and unselfish BUT only if a child chooses to share. ⁣

Forcing a child to share may not inspire the values you’re trying to encourage. By the very nature of how a child develops a sense of himself and the world around him, selfishness precedes generosity.⁣

When a child wants something another child is playing with, it’s reasonable to ask the child to find something else to play with until their buddy is finished.⁣ Toddlers can learn to take turns instead of grabbing the toy from one child to give to another.

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t encourage your children to be generous. You can do that by being a good role model, having realistic expectations, and being supportive and patient. 

Kids learn to share once they develop empathy. In other words, they are able to understand the world from another viewpoint. Forcing sharing can become something children want to avoid and actually delay the natural development of generosity. 

You can’t teach a 6-month old to “use her words” instead of crying when she wants something. The same thing goes for teaching a young toddler to share. This is a fabulous goal, one that makes us feel proud of our children. But there's a developmentally appropriate time to encourage sharing. In the meantime, being a good example will be a powerful lesson.

Toddlers don't really understand the concept of sharing. They're working on their own development and focused on their own needs. While it's embarrassing when a toddler grabs another child's toy, it's also completely normal and expected.